Militant Mickey Mouse

I am not making this up. Hamas had a children's TV show that featured a Mickey Mouse rip-off named Farfour. Farfour preached violence against Isrealis and Americans to his young audience in a voice fit for a cartoon character.

This is one of those things that is scary and funny at the same time. Like John Wayne Gacy, the serial killer clown. Needless to say, I bet Disney is pissed.

What's next? A terrorist game show called "Who Wants to be a Martyr?":

HOST: Akmed, this next question is for 200,000 dinars. How many Jews died in the Holocaust?
AKMED: Not enough, because there are still some left.
HOST: Is that your final solution?

Phrases You Sometimes Hear When Your Life Isn’t Going As Well As It Could Be

"I want a divorce."
"We'll appeal."
"It's inoperable."
"It's terminal."
"You lost the election by a landslide."
"You're fired."
"We'd like to discuss your positive test results with you."
"That's not covered."
"That's not covered either."
"We're the FBI and we'd like to ask you a few questions."
"You're being audited."
"There were no survivors."
"We've never seen a back this badly broken before."
"I'll see you in court."
"Honey, we need to talk."
"It was a total loss."
"You can always learn to write with your left hand."
"Dad, can we visit you in prison?"
"We're terminating your contract."
"Your show has been cancelled."
"Yours is the smallest one I've ever seen."
"We're calling from the 'Maury' show, and we'd like you to be a guest."



Posted by Gloria

It's raining

Because it was nice out and gas was at over $3 a gallon, I decided to take my bike to the store. After I had traveled only a few blocks, it started pouring. I decided to endure it anyway, and continued on my way to the store. On my way back, I saw lighting bolts streaking in the distance. This had me thinking that I would watch golf on TV more if it took place in weather like this. I think it would have the same appeal that NASCAR has among some of its more morbid fans.

Curtains for the Firehouse?

Our good friend Jeanette Jaquish has asked me to plug the Firehouse Theater. The place might go bust by the end of the week if she can't come up with a way to pay the rent! Several new programs are listed below. If you are interested in helping, her contact info is listed below.

Firehouse Summer Theater Camp
Thursday, June 7 to June 22, Mon-Fri, 9am to 3:30 pm (after-care until 5pm for $2/half hour.) 12 day camp costs $275 (includes 9 tickets); $240 for additional siblings. $50 deposit. Balance due first day of camp. Lunch included.
"Let's Put On a Show!"
Campers will learn theater basics and put on a show. We will brainstorm ideas for a script with kids learning how to listen and build on others’ ideas. Each camper will write a small section of dialogue, then tied together and filled in by playwright Jeannette Jaquish using everyone’s best ideas. Kids will learn by doing: how to sew costumes, block a scene, set lights, write a press release, design and paint scenery and organize a backstage. They will also learn basic photography and video camera operation.Kids will try their hands at directing and writing dialogue. We will also take a few afternoons off to go swimming at Northside Pool.

~Please call Jeannette at 750-9013 to make your promise, or say you'll mail or drop off the deposit. I need a firm count.

~DIRECTORS:Kim McCutchan was a High School Drama Director for 2 high schools for 5 years in Ohio, has 6 years of teaching and directing summer theater camp, and directed several community theaters for 10 years. Jeannette Jaquish runs the Firehouse Theater, and before that, the Shoestring Theater in Fort Wayne, and in Tucson, AZ, at the Red Barn Theater. She has produced over 16 shows and written 9 plays which she offers on her website.

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"Hansel & Gretel" Auditions are Saturday, May 12, at 6pm.
Simple song and dance and lots of absurd comedy and the unexpected.Seeking age 5 through adult. Rehearsals & performances are flexible. Call Jeannette at 750-9013.

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Happy Birthday Firehouse - All Actors & Crew Party
Friday May 11, 7-10 pm
Every actor and crew person who has ever worked at the Firehouse is invited. Please bring snacks, food or drinks to share, favorite CDs, photos, etc. Exchange phone numbers and memories.Jeannette JaquishFirehouse Theaterwww.firehouse-fw.com750-9013

What's this?

This is
A. God.
B. Aliens.
C. Rush Limbaugh holding a lighter next to his butt and farting.
D. An electrical transformer exploding near the corner of Coldwater and Dupont Rd.

If you picked D, you are correct. You are either very smart or you just followed the rule of thumb that the most detailed answer in a multiple choice question is probably the correct one.

Check Out This Fine Bitch!

I went to the dog show yesterday. Quite a few bitches and sons of bitches were on display.

Guess where I'm blogging from?

I'll give you a hint. I have a needle in my arm and I'm not at Robert Downey Jr.'s house.

Give up? I'm donating blood platelets and plasma at the Red Cross. They let us use the Internet here now. Only problem is, I have to type one handed on a keyboard that's shaking. So this is a brief post. Man, do I love multitasking.